Eyek Ntekim 

Writer + Content Creator

Hello and welcome to my blog! AfrikanRising is a place where I (Eyek) discuss (complete) health, beauty, and social justice. As a twentysomething year old Nigerian, I'm sharing my stories, from my struggles with self acceptance, to my favorite skincare products.

 I created this blog because I want you to feel something, whether that's joy, sadness or a desire to self-reflect. I'm learning and growing everyday and I want you to learn and grow with me. Join me on this journey and watch this African rise. 

 

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6 Benefits Of Having a (Near) Quarter Life Crisis

Yes beautiful people, there are some benefits.

I'm sure you've heard the term "midlife crisis". Basically, that's when a person goes through some changes. Most of the time, these changes apply to their self-identity. As we're all awaiting that crisis, let's work on this one.

Yes quarter life crises are real (Wikipedia said so, girl). Yes you can be going through one now. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. 

So I originally  wanted to do a "woe is me" post about how my life is not going how I'd hoped and blah, blah, blah, but I later decided that I want to use my words to uplift and not to burden so let's go.

It was literally this past Wednesday, I said out loud "Wow, I'm having a (near) quarter life crisis! " No, I was not excited, I was scared. I was confused because I thought you only a life crisis when your kids go off to college, but CLEARLY I was wrong.

Okay so anyways, I had to think about what my struggles were and I realized they started with me trying to figure out who I am and I realized that all the issues I have,  stemmed from that. My general areas of stress were pretty obvious: Friends, my future, and my self-esteem. As you can see, they stem from one thing: my identity, as in who I am. I'm going to talk about this experience in a future post but let's talk about all the yummy things that can happen when you have a (near) quarter life crisis. (If ya'll want a woe is me post, I can make that happen quite easily though)

1.) Self- Reflection

Basically, you can start calling yourself out on your sh*t. It's so hard to do this, no matter how "humble" you are. The most painful and stressful thing to do is look within yourself (dramatic) and figure what's working and what's not. The are a lot of benefits to self-reflection. For me, I think that self-reflection forces  me to hold myself accountable and also it helps with having a better, or in this case, a "new outlook"

2.) New Outlooks

What I mean by "outlooks" is how you view your life, but most importantly how you view your potential in life. During this time, you might start thinking about how your outlook aligns with those around you. You probably will find yourself having to re-evaluate your "squad". And that's a good thing. When you realize that life is not going according to your plan, you get to reimagine or modify your dreams or have even bigger dreams and goals. (Wow I sound like a self-help coach..OMG)

3.) New Squad

*Umm I'm feeling some type of way about using that word but I had to*. This for me has been the toughest part of the quarter life crisis. I think this is so tough because I have to think about the place I'm coming from with re-evaluating my friendships. It's very easy to come from a place of being the "victim". It's very easy to say that your friends "did" this and "did" that, but you also have to think of your role in it. By the same token, there are such things as toxic friendships. There are people who are simply dead weight. You don't want to let them go because of history or even worse, you (like me) don't want to be alone. You (like me) know people who are "a mess" and  have no friends and you don't want to be like them. You want to post selfie videos on the snap (snapchat) with your day 1's for goodness sake!  This goes back to self-reflection. You have an awesome opportunity to look at who you call friends and either work through your issues, or sift out the ones who've got to go. I fear being alone. I fear not having a "squad" but sometimes, you have to go through this process so that you can be surrounded by people who are for you, and people who you're for as well. You can think about and start moving people out who don't deserve your time or energy. This is a tough one but it's a benefit nonetheless.

4.) Redirection

This is pretty straight forward. During this time, you can start redirecting your energy into things that matter. You'll be able to start thinking about what needs your time and what doesn't. You can do fun stuff like work out, or drink a smoothie, or moisturize your hair under that protective style. It's as complicated or as simple as that.

5.) Exploration

Since you don't know who you are anymore (dramatic once again) you can start tapping into and doing things you've never done before because back then, that wasn't "you". 

6.) Very Few (Or No) F's Available

You can look at the good and the bad about you and love  it. You can start tuning out the people who love giving "advice" or the ones who are so judgmental and just. do. you. Ideally,  this starts a life long journey through losing F's day by day (I just recently started my journey so I'm hype rn). 

Are you currently going through  a quarter life crisis? Have you gone through one? Did you like this post? I want to hear (well, read)  what you have to say. Please comment below. God bless.

Thanks for reading

-Eyek 

"You've Lost Weight" Is NOT A compliment

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